Special Friend, Special Gifts

I am truly blessed with the most amazing girlfriends. I love how each of them have their own wonderful and unique qualities, and each of them bring something different and special to my life.

Jennae blesses me in more ways than one, two, three, or five! We met while serving the junior high group at our church in Clovis in 2004. Since then, even through me moving away, the Lord continues to draw us closer together as friends and sisters. One of the many gifts the Lord has blessed her with is gift giving. Every gift I receive from Jennae has meaning and purpose behind it. Her most recent gifts took the cake.

For my birthday (in September) she gave me 2 things. One was a journal where she wrote the sweetest message to Baby Burns, love Auntie Jennae. The second was a CD full of worship songs. They both were such an incredible blessing, and the Lord sure used them. While I was pregnant, I was so sick that I struggled reading in general, but I was really struggling with my bible reading, and I shared that with her. So she gave me the CD so I could relax and enjoy songs about the Lord while worshiping Him. The journal was so I could record all the events and emotions and thoughts throughout the pregnancy, and that I did.

(photo taken in Forest Falls)

What was really amazing was the way these gifts were used during and after the miscarriage.

I was SO thankful for both. When everything was happening and we could do nothing but cry, the CD brought great peace. One amazing song really hit me. It says, "He gives and takes away, for He knows what's good for us." The Lord knew how we need to grow through this experience, and I know He will will continue to show us His plans for this in the future.

The journal served as a great healing factor. It was really great to be able to write down all my thoughts from the beginning of the pregnancy to the end. I will cherish this journal forever. This baby will always be our first child, and I am thankful that I have these memories.

My dearest friend and sister, I can not thank you enough for all your love, care, prayers, and support. The Lord is using you mightily in my life and many others. I wish we lived closer, but even through distance you continue to be one of my closest friends. You are such a calming factor in my life. Thank you for always being a beautiful example of a woman of God. I love you!

Roots

A couple days after we found out that we lost our baby, Brandon and I were able to get away and enjoy some time alone in the beautiful and fresh mountains of Forest Falls. We found a beautiful and quiet little area by some little waterfalls. Our time there was crucial to our personal healing and grieving. Right when we sat down, I immediately noticed this tree, and this is what I journaled . . .

In front of me is a tree whose roots are completely above ground. As I look at it more closely, I wonder how it is still standing--it must have strong roots underground. This makes me think about the truth and love of the Lord and how deep it runs. I feel like right now I have many roots that are sticking out and visible. Roots of fear, anxiety, doubt. Though, even still, I, we, are still standing, and though weak at times, we are standing strong. Through this sadness, we have not wavered in the truth of Christ and in the knowledge and trust of His goodness. So like this tree, we stand with roots of God's grace deep within our hearts as this tree's roots and deep within this soil, and for that my heart is thankful.

"Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him, rooted and built up in Him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving."

Colossians 2:6-7

I know you are using this as a teaching time, Lord, and though right now I have to tell my heart to be grateful, I know I eventually will be. Father, please use this as a time where we may share your name and your goodness in time of sorrow--boldly. May we not waste this sadness.

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